As I looked through the events of the past 12 months I stumbled on a set of photos that made me giggle. I decided to forget all the standard measures of the year: how have we developed as a family? Have we achieved the goals we set ourselves last New Year, personally emotionally, career wise? Has our blog/charity work/campaigning taken the direction we wanted?
Instead I looked through the eyes of our youngest daughter, Natty. She's taken enough photos of and by herself to show us what this year has really been about from her perspective, and that is after all, what this blog is all about; listening to the voice of those with Trisomy 21.
I hope you enjoy our alternative look at 2013... a year in selfies, taken by a young 6/7 year old photographer with Down syndrome.
I know that ad inclusion is a very important part of what we campaign for here at Downs Side Up. Natty and a team of others across the UK have been getting their faces into catalogues, brochures, websites, films and commercials, showing the world a different kind of beauty, acting as role models for others and encouraging the the PR teams to look at representing every one of us in their marketing strategies. Read about the pioneers who are changing attitudes here.
I have to admit though that writing around to companies and attending castings was a very time consuming process, but happy in the knowledge that increasing numbers of companies were opening their modelling criteria to those with disabilities and others parents were forging ahead, I guess I relaxed the pressure a little. I also found myself caught up in other writing and media campaigns which took all my focus.
But actually I am left wondering if companies really are employing a long term policy of inclusive advertising, or simply engaging in one offs for whatever reason...
So, I shall start looking around for more modelling opportunities for Natty, our model with Down Syndrome. Locally as far as possible, as it can be slotted into our day so easily that way, taking little away from school time. If everyone did a little bit here and there for a local tourist attraction or shop or company we could cover the country in a network of inclusive advertising.
For now we've entered Natty into the Face of Kinder 2013 competition. If you would like to vote for her you can do so here. (Vting has closed).
Just type Natty (there's only one) and follow the instructions. It takes around a minute. You can vote for as many children as you like, so enter your child too and we can all vote for each other's children.
So go on, dust off your keyboards, get voting and get writing to those companies!
Together we can make a difference and get disability into the media.
The empty anticipation of the 7am hospital carpark.
Mia was at home having breakfast with her Godmum, nervous herself and demanding that she come too, in only the way a 9 year old understands how to show her concern for her little sister. We parked up easily and unloaded the coolbox of delights, the ridiculously overstuffed overnight case (I hate to be unprepared for all eventualities), and of course Dolly the rag doll who had been helping us role play the tonsil operation that was due to take place later that morning. The preparation had been thorough and we were as ready as we would ever be.
Daddy Downs Side Up leads Natty proudly into the empty hospital
We entered the hospital, Natty, Dolly and Daddy Downs Side Up a little ahead.
The same hospital he proudly carried her into ahead of me after we were blue-light-dashed there minutes after her birth in our family bathroom. The same nerves wracked our bodies now as they did then. Different fears, but no less physical in their manifestation.
The place holds memories.
Our hearts too were carrying the imprints of the heart surgery of 3 years before. A different hospital that time, but the thought of carrying our littlest one into another operating theatre and watching her succumb to the anaesthetic before our eyes was all too raw. The feeling of trusting another human being implicitly with your child's life is one that makes all parents feel so very powerless.
On the outside we were overly, chitty chatty jolly, in the way nervous parents are when they are putting on a brave face for their children. The tears welled in my eyes though as I asked if Dolly was being a good girl, if Natty had seen the lovely painting on the wall, if she would like a fruit bar when we got there and a play in the lovely play room?
She told dolly how brave she was. And I wondered just how brave Natty would be when the time came, flashbacks of previous traumatic blood tests, her little body pinned down by 3 adults, filling my thoughts.
We were the first to enter the ward to surprised looks from the staff nurse, a wonderful woman who had me us for the pre op checks the week before.
"Oh, you're here?!"
"I thought they were going to postpone Natty's op."
No, surely not.
No-one had called, there had been no letter.
We were ready.
Time and emotions and money and days off and enlisting help had been invested.
My mouth managed to ask why. My husband stood fuming but saying little. We both knew that we must not pass on our annoyance to Natty.
It transpired that a series of miscommuniations and lost and delayed letters had resulted in the need for Natty to have an anaesthetist and surgeon with specialist knowledge not being flagged up until the last few days. Both of the necessary professionals were in fact on holiday. If it hadn't been for this amazing staff nurse listening to my concerns for extra care in the previous weeks, then it might not have been flagged up at all.
We left swiftly and hurried home, a bit shocked to be honest. Once home we found the letter detailing the change, in our letter box. It had arrived the previous afternoon and hadn't been spotted amid the packing and treat-purchasing activities. Post had been the last thing on my mind.
There was nothing we could do. So we told Natty it had been another practice, that she and Dolly had been really good girls. A hearty breakfast and a handful of chocolate buttons were consumed and there was still enough time to get her changed into her uniform in time to deliver her to school for 8.50.
The very silver lining to all of this was that Natty was able to go on her school trip with her classmates that day. And attend the end of term festivities. And go to the beach with us after school for a picnic, for that really had been the hottest week of the year.
And quite frankly who wants to be on a stuffy hospital ward with a sore throat when you could be having so much more fun!
We have a new date for next week now, and all will be well. The preparation hasn't gone to waste and the treats are still waiting. Natty's safety is paramount after all, never mind a little inconvenience and I am thankful that she will have the correct team waiting for her when she gets there.
Thank you all for your well wishes and kind thoughts.
Tomorrow (finally) is the very last day (we thought it would never come) of our school year! Natty has finished her second year of formal education, we call it year 1 in the UK (confusing I know, but it comes after Reception Year).
It's been a wonderful year with many highs, culminating in a school report with all A's for effort in every subject, regardless of achievement. Yep, that's our Natty, throwing herself into everything she does with gusto.
Natty has learnt to write all her letters, has just moved to reading books at level 2 with a couple of sentences to a page, and loves her number work.
Not only that but she has made many firm friends and creates games with them, throws herself into PE and loves to chat over lunch with others. There has been far less 'hands on' interaction with her peers when she is tired, so she has learn appropriate behaviour for her age.
She's a valued member of her class and has become increasingly independent with all areas of self help. We are overjoyed! And how far we have all travelled in that past year, when I look back to the worries and fears I had when she began her scolastic journey.
So, how do we mark the end of a year's worth of mornings of dashing around the house shouting 'shoes', 'finish your porridge' and 'where's the dog/book bag/hair bobble/show and tell/Doublebase cream?' while Natty sings Mary Poppins, and Mia draws another picture of a dinosaur for a friend???
Well, we thank those we couldn't have done it without.
There's a lot of chat about whether we should give gifts to teachers at the end of term. It's just their job, they're paid to do it, right?
Well, yes they are, but most of them really go the extra mile to ensure that our most treasured loved ones are happy and healthy and reach their potential in a fun way. And if your child has a TA or two that help them personally, then they deserve even more recognition. They have encouraged and explained, nurtured the friendships, known when to stand back and when to get involved. They have learnt the art of helping without being seen, monitoring whilst sitting next to someone else. They have liasied between home and school. They have spent evenings and weekends making materials and planning fun new ways of learning. None of which falls into 'simply doing your job', not at any price.
And more importantly, what lesson are we teaching our children when we encourage them to write a thank you card and give a simple present? We are teaching them to show gratitude, to say thank you to others for their efforts. It's a simple question of manners and being part of a community that helps each other.
So, we have a little gift for the 2 teachers and the TAs (plus an oh-too-cute-not-to-buy babygrow for one TA's new baby,) and for everyone else the girls decorated a cardboard box tonight. I have bought some inexpensive treats to go inside to make a staff room hamper: tea, herb teas, coffee, biscuits, chocolates, cordials and so on.
I know other parents give cut flowers from the garden, freshly laid eggs or homemade cakes or crafts. It really needn't cost the earth to say thank you.
Photographer Simon Burt put together a striking series of portraits of children and young people with Down's Syndrome last year. It has been hung at the Eden Project and touring ever since and has now just taken pride of place in the main link corridor in the Royal Cornwall Hospital.
Natty had an appointment there last week and I took her to see the images afterwards. She immediately spotted herself way up high, and screamed,
'It's meeee!'
Well, that certainly got the attention of many a passerby, who shared her unstoppable smile.
The exhibition looks fabulous, do have a peek if you are passing.
A video clip of the first moment Natty found her balance on the Wishbone Bike just a few weeks after we had removed the 3rd wheel, converting it from a trike to a bike.
We'd had the trike for about 3 years, it was simply perfect for little legs, with fully adjustable height. But now we are bicyclists!
Just look at Natty's face at the end!. The expression shows just how very proud she is of herself.
Thank you thank you thank you for all who voted for Downs Side Up in the Britmums Brilliance in Blogging Awards. It has been announced as a finalist in the Inspire Category, one of 6 to make it through.
What a huge honour indeed, and every one in that category is a winner to me, all powerful, selfless writers whose motivation is to help others.
Although I don't consider myself to be up for the award, instead it is for my blog, which truly has taken on a life of its own. I simply follow its lead and go where the readers and Natty take me...
Next weekend we all head to London for the Britmums Live event, a kind of Mecca for Bloggers, but with Prosecco!
It's a chance to mingle, meet online friends again and learn how to make your blog a better and more beautiful haven and it is here they will announce the finalists.
It's all wonderfully exciting, and right now, between fighting Councillors who say children with disabilities should be 'put down' and trying to get the moral issues of the newDS screening test raised and the family's views heard, it will be a welcome oasis of positivity for me.
Our house was filled with excited women and one token man, all preening and beautifying each other.
We don't get out of our jeans and wellies nearly often enough, obviously!
Natty and Mia beamed from ear to ear as we washed and straightened hair, painted nails, including a layer of glitter, and gathered dresses, tights, new patent shoes and hair bows together. Their babysitter is a hairdresser and she came in to help and Natty sat stock still while she wielded the scary looking straightening irons through her fine hair. She wanted a touch of lip gloss and a wave of mascara to be like Mummy and Mia too.
We even pinned Daddy Downs Side Up down and plucked his eyebrowns and buffed his nails, and shaved his head. (You all do that to your menfolk before a big night out, right?)
Handbags were found and laid out ready...
Ready for the biggest family night of our lives! For we had all been invited to the Pirate FM Local Heroes Award Ceremony, a glitzy black tie affair, taking place against the beautiful backdrop of the Eden Project. Little Natty had been awarded the Child of Courage or Achievement Award for her modelling, opening of doors for children with disabilities everywhere and gently changing perceptions as she melts hearts wherever she goes.
And yes, there was to be a disco. "With actual DJs who actually work on Pirate FM playing the music we listen to on the radio". (Mia G, 9)
And yes, there was to be "staying up late". (Natty, 6)
And yes, the girls were "coming too". (Natty 6)
...And yes, there "was going to be champagne". (Mummy, 43).
We were dressed and ready to leave in plenty of time. The girls were a cloud of pink and yellow chiffon in the back of the car. As they sat poker still, I joked to Bob that my only stress was keeping them clean until the point that the awards were given out. My biggest nightmare would be a dinner swimming in gravy and a pudding floating in chocolate sauce. I believe pale chiffon is the biggest magnet for dark brown liquid foodstuffs.
"I'm sure they won't serve that..." (Daddy)
Mia and Natty all set to party
On arrival there was a red carpet to float along while photographers took shots from every angle. I bristled with pride as Natty and Mia confidently strode into the room filled with smartly dressed adults, with not another child in sight, apart from the wonderful young woman Megan Rumsey who had won Young Person of the Year for being an incredible sister and voice for those with disabilities.
Mia marvelled at the beautiful gowns, Natty asked everyone "What's your name?"
We sat at the beautifully decorated table, complete with gold bows on the back of the chairs and gold star-shapped ballons, "Just like my shoes!" exclaimed Natty.
Of course, just for you inspirational girl.
We chatted to our category sponsors, the truly lovely people from Kidzworld who helped set up the event, and began eating. A simple Caprese salad to begin, followed by roast beef and... A SEA OF GRAVY!
I panicked (thinking of possible big brown stain right down the front of that yellow chiffon) and the lovely waitress brought Natty a dry dinner without the sauce poor mite. Both girls had to be pursuaded by everyone at the table to wear their napkins, so we all ended up doing it to set an example.
Napkin fun
Help, my mother is embarrassing me
Oh and yes, there was chocolate sauce with the brownie for desert!
After dinner the the award ceremony opened with former X Factor star Amelia Lily singing a beautiful trio of songs, the last of which had the most beautiful lyrics that seemed so fitting for Natty. 'You Bring Joy, You Bring Pain'. My facade cracked and I began to cry. Natty took to the stage to meet Amelia and was presented with a signed photo of the singer.
There was some dancing and quite a bit of showing off and bottom wiggling.
That's Natty not Amelia you understand!
We were all emotional before we had even begun.
The awards began and we were all treat to an amazing array of stories that affirmed our belief in community and the human spirit.
An elderly neighbour who collects prescriptions for those who can't get out. A young woman driven to raise money for eye charities following an eye problem of her own.
A chef who happens to be a supportive and thoughtful boss as well as a culinary genius.
Parent of the Year, who is a positive force for her children, one of whom has Autism, despite being a single Mum and having her own health issues.
An amazingly brave Emergency service worker, a coastal rescuer, an environmental guardian angel, an encouraging teacher and great paralympic sportswoman and a lady with healing hands.
Natty's award was called. She and Mia took to the stage with neither parent to help them. I wanted both girls to feel an equal part of the celebrations, for Natty is only Natty because her big sister is such an incredible influence on her.
A video clip was played, showing an interview with Natty and I. I don't mind admitting I sobbed like a baby, taking handfuls of the tissues thoughtfully provided on each table.
The clip was funny as well as heartwarming, featuring raspberries, funny faces, more bottom wiggling and a few "You are joking!'s". You can watch it here.
The audience laughed with Natty and she and Mia took the applause well, beaming even wider from ear to ear.
They were presented with a selection of toys from World's Apart (who Natty has modelled for ) and a family pass to Kidzworld. Natty couldn't have been happier as she stood and posed for the journalists centre stage.
We had just enough time to meet a couple of the Heroes before some had to leave.
2 people really stood out for me, Matt Vernon who tried desperately to save the woman whose car slipped off the King Harry Ferry slipway last month. An unassuming man who embodies all that society should be, and Shane Edwards who offers oncology massage and has worked her calming and relaxing magic on over 1000 cancer sufferers many of them terminally ill. A woman who simply radiates love and care.
We were just throwing some shapes on the dancefloor when we realised we were in danger of turning into pumpkins. Natty was flagging and finding the music a little loud, so Mia had to cut her wild routine to Guns and Roses short. It was half past midnight!
Thank you, thank you, thank you to all the sponsors and Pirate FM and the judges and nominators and fellow heroes and all those who made Friday night possible.
I know 2 little ladies who had, quite simple, the night of their lives.
I leave you with a quote from Natty this weekend:
"I want party again. I want gold shoes and present for me and surprise for me and music and dance, waggy bottom." And that sums it up in a nutshell.
Most children with Down's Syndrome need SALT sessions to help them communicate more easily and speak more clearly. This can focus on the use of signing/Makaton, jaw position exercises and using certain types of cups, toys etc, or it can be about having fun with sounds and using visual ways to break down words. I was a language teacher in a previous life, well, in my life before becoming a Mum. I used to teach English as a Foreign Language and that very often entailed helping students to produce quite tricky sounds in a fun and relaxed, even silly way.
I decided to take the same approach with Natty. She's been having trouble with ____sp words, such as crisp. They tended to come out as ____ps, or crips. So, we took each syllable as a unit and reeeeeally exaggerated it, pulling funny faces and giggling as we went.
crisssssssssP The P sound is what is called an unvoiced plosive, which basically means that lots of air shoots out of your mouth when you say it. So, you can have masses of fun practising moving paper in front of your mouth, or, as we demonstrate here, blowing someone's hair around. Watch Natty and I work on the word wasssssssssP at story time.
I really wanted to leave you on a Friday with a giggle. A light-hearted laugh. An antidote to all the parliamentary shanannigans and serious SEN articles and so on.
Well this week, when we returned home from Mia's school play, all on a high and singing proudly, full of jollity, Natty decided she would like to take some photos of the family.
We were all in the kitchen, just scoffing a late supper before bed. After all, you can't do a school play that finishes at 7.30 without celebratory chips afterwards can you....
Anyway, Daddy Downs Side Up gave Natty his phone and she began snapping away.
First she came up with this
then this
and finally this
Aren't they lovely? And very well taken Natty I must say.
Well then the little photo button must have slid across to video. We were all oblivious and carried on our happy dancing, whilst tidying the kitchen in readiness for bed, and posing for Natty's snaps in between.
When we looked at the results afterwards, this is what we found. Hilarious little 3 second clips of Natty's world. I have to admit that after watching them all, I was laughing so hard that I had to jiggle cross-legged to the loo. Maybe you just had to be there, or maybe you'll find it funny too. Bear in mind we all thought she was taking stills...
I bring you, Natty's camerawork: Clip 1, My Sister Mia
aka Animal from the Muppets
My Daddy and Mummy posing.
Haha, I had them fooled.
Mummy didn't know I took this one.
Check out her moves!
And the one that made Mummy laugh so hard she cried:
Mummy folds a tea towel and poses for the camera whilst dancing.
Enjoy your Easter weekend! Much love from the Downs Side Up team x
Sarah is an old friend of mine. We used to teach languages together many moons ago.
When Natty was around 2 and Mia 4, and my need for some sleep, the odd break and some time alone with individual siblings became pressing, she helped me out through the summer holidays. Here are her recollections of that time, although I think she is selling herself short. The girls still remember her teaching them how to do a wicked foot massage too. "Say hello to the feet" she would tell them :)
Those pesky pirates!
Natty, Mia and the incompetent Nanny
Poor girls.
At the tender ages of just 2 and
4, to be faced with the prospect of a whole Summer being looked after by
someone with no experience whatsoever in how to change nappies, read a story
with the right voices for each
character and heaven forbid, had never even heard of Sporticus......A challenge
indeed.
The whole situation could be
summed up in 3 small words: BAPTISM
OF FIRE.
Here is a list of things I hoped
to teach the girls:
1.How to make the longest daisy chain ever.
2.NEVER pick Foxgloves.
3.The words to Yellow Submarine.
4.How to stage a fantastic dance performance.
5.Who Mrs. Doyle of Father Ted fame is (Go on Go
on Go on....always achieved results)
Here is a list of things I learned during my brief time
with the Goleniowskas:
1.How to ensure that shoes stayed ON.
2.How to pronounce “Protarchaeopteryx” and a variety of other dinosaur names.
3.How to spot a choking hazard at 100 paces.
4.What to do when the afore-mentioned choking hazard
had not been spotted, and how to deal
with the ensuing results.
5.Mr. B the teacher cannot be usurped in the dressing up
stakes.
6.Princess towers can be made out of absolutely
ANYTHING.
7.How to bake a show-stopping Walnut and Banana
cakes with a plethora of healthy ingredients that shouldn’t really be in there.
8.With perseverance ANYTHING can be achieved.
God bless those little pixies and
all that they taught me.
I wouldn’t have swapped this experience for the World.
I haven't written one of our HOME SCHOOLING posts for a while now.
I flexi-school Natty at home one day per week which allows her a quiet day with undivided attention to focus on her reading, writing and numeracy skills. We also do a hearty slice of life skills, such as cooking, laundry sorting, grocery shopping, even bed-making. We then usually fit in a SWIM or a run on the beach. Natty gets a mid-week rest which she so often needs and, quite simply, we love our time together.
This half term the topic at school is JOBS. Natty knew a few of the more obvious roles, perhaps those involving uniforms or the ones that feature in her life like doctors and dentists. The other jobs I chose to focus on today were those I knew she understood and had met, but perhaps didn't know the term for. So here are the activities we enjoyed together:
1) I found and copied pictures of people doing jobs. These are readily available to download free from many online educational sites.
2) I copied 2 sheets of these images. Natty coloured in and drew on one as we chatted about what the people were doing.
3) I cut up Natty's coloured in sheet to make smaller individual flash cards. We labelled each picture with the job title.
4) Natty matched the flashcard to each picture and we repeated the words and talked about what the people were doing again, using Makaton if necessary.
5) We then went to find a story about jobs and cuddled up to read together. Natty chose Doctor Daisy.
6) Finally we raided the dressing up box and Natty dressed in as many different job outfits as she could think of. As you can see from the doctor's afro (formerly to be spotted on Daddy Downs Side Up at a 70s party) Natty had a free range over her choice of what to wear for each outfit.
Mind you, the firewoman's backwards baseball cap is a little unorthodox too.
There is no right or wrong way to teach your child at home. Just choose what they enjoy doing and adapt it. Most of all have fun and enjoy each other's company.
For more ideas such as learning about fruit and veg, shapes, textures, reading and writing skills, have a look at our ACTIVITIES TO TRY AT HOME page.
Once upon a time, far too many moons ago, I was a Girl Guide. I have many fond memories from that time and I recall our group being supportive, open, warm and encouraging to all girls. We were proud of the fact we pooled our skills and helped each other where there were weaknesses. I learnt a great deal from my time there which I carry forward into the work I do today.
I'm sure the Girl Guide Association has moved on greatly over the last 30 years, as has the Scout Movement. I expect the activities are even more thrilling, the skills imparted more practical, the events better organised and the ethos even more inclusive.
I'm sure, then, that you are as saddened as I to hear of a less than welcoming Brown Owl. One whose reluctance about accepting a new Guide with a learning disability was aired.
I am always one to think of both sides in every situation, and you may well simply have a woman here who was nervous about whether she had the skills to adapt to teaching a young lady whose learning styles differ, but who expressed those concerns wrongly.
Perhaps she felt she would need additonal training or to alter her working style, and that filled her with dread.
Perhaps she has a personal experience of disability which is painful for her. After all people manifest guilt and remorse and pain in a miriad of ways.
Perhaps her ideas are genuinely not up to what the Guide Movement expects and she is in the wrong role.
Wise words for us all from model Natty Goleniowska who has Down's Syndrome
Either way I feel heavy-hearted, not only for the girl and her family who feel offended, but also for the lady in question, who has clearly been denied the benefits of a truly inclusive society. For inclusion is a two-way street which we were denied growing up in this country many years ago. Our children's generation are lucky to have friends with learning disabilities, who teach them a different way of viewing the world and the most important lesson of all, which is acceptance, something this lady lacks.
I think the guides she is claiming to wish to protect could teach her much on this important lesson in life.
This situation is not like many I find myself writing to resolve; countering those like former UKiP candidate Geoffery Clark who called for compulsory termination of babies with disabilities (OPEN LETTER TO MR CLARK), or supporting a family whose daughter with Down's Syndrome is being forced out of a school in Malaysia by other, ignorant, parents taking legal action against her.
No, this is a more widespread, insipid kind of prejudice and discrimination but which is thankfully easier to change through education.
I do think a public response would do much to allay the public anger that has arisen from this incident and I await your reply, which I will publish to the thousands of families and professions within our network.
I would also like to offer my services as a speaker and trainer in inclusion and disability for institutions such as yours.
I very much hope that the 12 year old girl in question will feel fully welcomes into one of your groups shortly, as I hope both our girls will be when the time comes. None of should let a blip like this stop us seeking mainstream activities for our children.
Hayley Goleniowska Author of Europe's Top Down's Syndrome Blog: DOWNS SIDE UP Mum of ambassador and model NATTY GOLENIOWSKA, 6, who has Down's Syndrome Speaker, campaigner, writer, trainer, educator, expert in Down's Syndrome Facebook: Downs Side Up Twitter: @DownsSideUp "Changing perceptions of Down's Syndrome gently from within hearts"
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The Girl Guides later responded favourably with the following statement:
Girlguiding UK is open to all girls and young women. This is one of our most important values – and we strive to uphold it in all circumstances. We are very proud to have many young members with Down’s Syndrome and other disabilities. And we would like to welcome more. We encourage all our volunteers to include young members with disabilities and we have a network of special needs advisors and specific resources to support them in this.
It is very difficult to comment on an individual circumstance without knowing the details. However, we are very saddened if any potential young member, and their family, feels they have been excluded from joining us. We very much hope to have a conversation with the family and the volunteer as quickly as possible to support them both to find a way to include this girl in guiding – and be a full part of everything we offer.
We would encourage anybody with concerns to contact our membership support services: msswebconcerns@girlguiding.org.uk
We are a family that loves to swim. The girls are little mermaids. Swimming boosts self esteem, is a healthy form of excercise, is fun and helps develop breath control and lung capacity, essential for speech development would you believe!
Learning to swim
Admittedly we never manage to make it a weekly affair. Snotty noses, burst ear drums and chest infections sometimes get in the way. Or I just can't face trying to coax Natty in and out of clothes and costumes like a reluctant and wriggly wet eel.
But we go as often as we can and until now we haven't signed the girls up to formal lessons, preferring to let then learn through play and our example. Mia swam for the first time on a hot holiday where she was trying desperately to copy some older children, splashing for hours per day in an infinity pool. Natty in her turn has always been motivated by trying to be like her older sister. Never underestimate peer pressure.
Recently Natty swam a width of the pool for the very first time, unaided, without help or armbands. Yes alone. She slid in from the side, swam across and climbed out the other side. Admittedly she didn't come up for air and did all of it underwater, but we can work on breathing later.
Since that moment we have signed her up to a local class, which she adores. She's coming on in leaps and bounds with a fabulous teacher who believes in her.
So, here are our tips to encourage your child to swim:
***Never leave a child alone in water, whatever swim aid you are using.***
1) Start early Introduce your baby to water as soon as they are well enough to avoid fear later on. I know they say this isn't necessary, but I waited for all the jabs to be administered first. 2) Play in the bath Don't be afraid to get children to blow bubbles into the water, submerging their faces for a few seconds. Make up silly songs, pull funny faces as you do the same. 3) Use a swim nappy There are disposable or re-useable swim nappies available with cuffs on the leg to prevent contamination of the pool, special trunks or swimming costume with built-in continence support (these are available for older children too). Natty always seemed to prefer doing a poo in water until recently, be it bath or pool, so this was essential unless you want to be barred from your local pool! 4) Choose a reliable swim aid This is essential to help you both relax until your child is confident to move to the next level. We tried the suits with the floats built in as well as the little jackets with pockets to put foam floats in, but I found it hard to grab Natty round the waist to lift her wearing these. We eventually discovered the Sevylor Puddle Jumper Floatation Device (pictured above). Utter brilliance! It has armbands and a tummy float but it's all joined together and does up at the back. The child cannot sink, floats face up and also cannot run away from you ripping their armbands off as they go and jumping in at the deep end with you hurtling after them, terrified! They cannot remove this device. One day we left our Puddle Jumper behind at the pool and someone took it. Rather than buy a new one it was the boost we needed to move to the next step, which was simply armbands. Choose a variety that roll on simply, or inflate whilst on the child's arms. Natty's arms are short so we always had to use a very small pair, 6-12 months. 5) Removed the armbands for a few minutes at each session We pushed Natty through the water from one adult to the other. We let her play freely in the children's pool so she could get used to how her body felt in water without buoyancy aids. We then built up the distances slightly. My neighbour was the one who encouraged me not to leap forward and grab Natty as soon as she began to sink. This is hard to do as a nervous, protective parent, and could be the point you need an instructor to help if you are feeling worried about 'letting go'. She struggled for a second or two and then, hey presto, she found the strength and energy to make the extra effort needed to pull herself forward the required few centimetres to reach me. 6) Always take toys Plastic cups and interesting objects that float distract your child and make swimming time fun. 7) Protect ears Wax ear plugs and neopreme headbands are available if your child hates getting their ears wet or is prone to ear infections. 8) Protect eyes A top class pair of goggles are a must. We bought a pair more akin to a snorkel mask, that keep the whole eye area dry as Natty seems particularly sensitive to chlorine. 9) Little and often Keep your swimming sessions short. This is better than long sessions where the child gets fed up and tired 10) Praise Never push your child to do what they aren't comfortable with. Remember to have fun! That way your child will learn almost by accident. Be patient. It takes time.
I'm not saying rush out and buy a puppy, far from it.
Such an animal is a very serious commitment and if little one is tiny and often poorly then the extra hassle and hygiene worries would have tipped me over the edge. Wee and poo accidents on the floor near a crawling toddler would make me shudder. Finding time to train and walk and play with a new pet amidst hospital appointments and stays would have caused additional stress.
BUT, we are in a good place now (touch wood), the heart surgery is over, the appointments are few and far between. Natty knows not to eat a tail or a poo. So we took the plunge into puppydom.
I have observed the most unexpected upside to have Pippin in our house. Natty is no longer the youngest, smallest member. She can no longer grab most of the attention by means fair or foul. The dog has been a learning curve for her, at first nervous, now able to feed and pick him up, even attaching his lead today. I caught her carrying him to his toilet, saying "do poo poo here Pippin." Now she is the teacher.
Something has switched on in Nattys head. Another leap has been made. And suddenly she is conversing differently, full sentences are flowing. Tonight she used her knife and fork perfectly, bedtime was easier. It's as if she now feels more grown up because we have a new 'baby' in the house.
Before someone helpfully leaps in and tells me that dogs aren't just for Christmas, I'll explain that we have been toying with the idea of a puppy for many months. I favoured something large and robust. Daddy Downs Side Up thought something tiny would be easier to manage and less threatening to the girls. He was right. 3 days after Christmas a friends forwarded an ad for Chihuahuas that she had seen locally. That, as they say, was that. And the rest, as the saying goes, is history. The madness and travel of Christmas had passed. We were ready and the ideal dog was waiting. Here is a *CUTE PIC KLAXON* photo of Natty meeting her dog Pippin for the first time. What has been lovliest is that she is no longer the tiniest member of the G Unit, the one who needs toiletting help and explanations of how life works. She is now explaining and dictating to the micro-puppy, who, in DS terms, is just the right size for her to manage.
helped Natty learn to swim
